Perchance
by Trisanor
Summary: One-Shot: Christine made the wrong choice, and she knows it. Ten years pass. Her engagement to Raoul fails, she becomes the Prima Donna of the rebuilt Opera Populaire. And all she can think of is him...


19\. Phantom of the Opera

I open the door to my room after yet another grueling rehearsal. There is no rest for the weary performer, especially right before opening night. I walk into my room and put down my hair clips on my dresser, letting my hair fall in waves down my back. It has been ten years since the fiasco of Don Juan Triumphant. In those ten years everything has changed. I am no longer engaged to Raoul, and no longer feel any feelings for him. He still comes to the shows and is still the patron of the Opera House, but it is no longer because he has a personal interest in me.

It has taken me three years to recognize the fact that I have no feelings for Raoul, aside from the ones that a sister would have for a brother. There is no way that I would ever be able to marry him and then... sleep with him. The thought, even now, brings shivers down my spine. It has taken me another few years to figure out who my feelings belong to. They belong to my Angel of Music. He who had changed my life forever at the age of 18. I now know that it wasn't he who had the black heart, it was in fact my fault that he did so many of the horrible things that he did.

It was my selfish behavior that caused the death of so many, and the destruction of our dear opera house. During the recreation of the Opera house I made sure to have my input put in and I made sure to hire someone to reinstate the passageways just as they had been when my Angel lived among them. The mirror still has a passage behind it, and I re-created my Angel's home, in the hopes that he would one day return here.

I know they are foolish hopes, but they are my hopes in any case. Before the renovation, I did my best to clean out my Angel's things and salvage as much as I could after the mob raid on his home.

Since my angel has been gone my voice has slowly been deteriorating. I haven't been keeping in practice as much, simply because I don't know how to practice without his guidance. Some Operas require the range I had when I was in better practice. I strive for these notes and yet I cannot land them because my angel isn't here to guide me in practice.

If only I wasn't such a fool when I was younger! I was an indecisive vixen! I had the hearts and devotions of two men! That is more than any girl could ever hope to have, and all I could do was play them until they both were driven to the brink of madness. My poor angel!

I sigh and sit in the chair at my vanity. I look around my room and sigh again as I imagine the numerous flowers that will fill it tomorrow night. All of these admirers, yet I want none of them. I can't remember how many men I have turned down who have offered their hearts to me. I feel bad, but I would feel worse if I took one of their offers. I have no heart to give in return. Mine was taken from me many years ago, when I found out that my Angel of Music was actually a man who could hold me and love me. A man who inspired my heart and voice to reach greater heights than they ever had.

All I want is to see him one more time. To come back to my room and see his single, perfect red rose sitting on my table wrapped with a black ribbon. It would always make my heart leap to see that sitting there for me. I start to tear up just thinking about the relationship I had lost because of my stupidity. My foolishness has destroyed something special for me. And here I sit now regretting the choices I had made as a young girl.

"Christine?" Meg calls from behind the door.

"Come in Meg," I say and wipe away the moisture gathering in my eyes.

"Christine," Meg repeats as she opens up the door, "are you going to come down for the All Hallows Eve party? Everyone will be there." Meg adds hoping that I will go with her.

"No Meg," I respond sadly and look at her, "I don't really want to go tonight. I will stay here. Maybe go visit Father's grave tonight." I tell her and smile tiredly. "I am just so tired Meg, I wouldn't be able to keep up with everyone else." I smile and she frowns slightly in response but doesn't argue.

"Okay Christine, but remember you need to come out sometime. As the Prima Donna you are expected to make at least a few appearances." Meg tries once more.

"I know Meg," I respond, "I just don't think that tonight will be one of those few appearances." I smile again at her.

"Well then, goodnight Christine. I do hope you feel better in the morning. We will miss you tonight." Meg says softly and closes the door behind her.

I smile at the place she was just occupying. I am hit by a memory of her and I as younger girls singing about my Angel of Music. I start to sing for my Angel.

" _Angel of Music, I denied you,_

 _Turning from true beauty,_

 _Angel my soul was weak,_

 _Forgive me._

 _Return at last, Phantom."_

I sing to my Angel, hoping he will be able to hear my plea to him. After a few minutes I sigh in defeat and I am about to leave my room when I hear a faint call.

" _Angel of Music, you denied me._

 _Forcing me into hiding,_

 _Angel, I hear your call,_

 _Forgiveness_

 _Will be yours, Forever."_

I look around the room trying to find where he is, but my Angel is a Master at throwing his voice. I smile in relief and tears spring to my eyes.

"Angel! Reveal yourself to me please. I need to see you again my Angel." I beg him.

"Christine... oh Christine." My Angel starts sadly. "It has been many years. I doubt you wish to see me ever again. I simply needed to see you one last time on this night when people believe in ghosts again. I will leave you to your Vicomte ma chere." He says and I hear his voice gradually start to fade.

"Wait! My Angel! Please! Don't leave me. I am not with the Vicomte! I don't love Raoul! My Angel! Please!" my voice brakes as the tears I had been holding back spill over my cheeks.

Almost instantly I hear a rustle of clothing as my Angel moves to hold me close to him. I grasp his shirt and lean into his arms. He murmurs soft, sweet nothings into my ears and smoothes my hair to try and stop me from crying. When that doesn't work he starts to sing to me. He sings a haunting melody that fits the night very well. I begin to recognize it to be Music of the Night. As he continues to sing, my tears stop and I close my eyes, listening to his heart beat and the low rumble in his chest that comes from his singing.

"My Angel," I say breathlessly and he stops singing.

"My name is Eric, Christine. I believe it high time that you knew my name." he responds softly, his head bowed.

"Eric," his name rolls off my tongue and I lift his head so that his eyes meet mine, "I need to ask for your forgiveness." I tell him softly.

"There is nothi..." he starts and I hold my hand up.

"There is something Eric. Don't you dare brush off what happened ten years ago as nothing. I was a foolish little girl who took advantage of the situation provided to her. I broke your heart and toyed with it, unknowingly, but it still happened. I need to apologize for that." I try to convey my feelings to him, and he simply looks at me his face growing stoic.

"This isn't what I want to say!" I cry out, "What I want to say is that... Eric..." I struggle to find the words to tell him what is on my mind.

"Christine, it is alright. I understand, you had feelings for the b... I mean Raoul. You had feelings for him and I was in the way. I took advantage o..." He tries again, and I can see how much it pains him.

"NO! Eric." I shout and then feel instantly guilty, "Eric, What I want to say is that..."

"I think I should go Christine. It was a mistake to come here in the first place." Eric says and gathers his cloak around him.

I watch helplessly as he goes to leave me forever. I can't let that happen! I can't let it happen again! I won't!

" _Past the point of no return! The final threshold. The bridge is crossed so stand and watch it burn!"_ I sing desperately to him and he stops dead in his tracks.

"Why do you sing that song Christine? Do you wish to torment me more?! You vixen. I can no longer bear the knowledge that..." I wrack my mind desperately; I need to quell his anger.

"I love you Eric!" I gasp and cover my mouth at my words. I didn't want to tell him that way. But there it is out in the open. His eyes are wide and he is just staring at me in disbelief.

"Is that the game you are playing Christine?" he asks softly, "Did you call me back here only to humiliate your Angel more?" his voice is harsh and bitter.

"Eric," I whisper, tears falling from my eyes, "Please believe me. I love you. I really do. I have for years now. My only wish was that you would love me too." I look him in the eyes so he knows I am not lying to him and tears continue to fall.

"You love me Christine? Truly?" he asks softly, longingly.

"Always, Eric. I have always loved you. I just didn't know what I had until it was gone." I intone softly to him and his eyes shine with a joy I have never seen before.

He walks over to me his feet making no noise as he does. His one hand cups my face softly and I close my eyes at the touch.

"You don't know how long I have been waiting to hear that from your lips Christine." He whispers his breath caressing my skin.

He closes the gap between us and takes me into his arms as he presses his lips gently against my own. This kiss far more innocent than our last one was ten years ago. I lean into his body as my knees give out beneath me. I have been waiting for this moment for years. I curl my fingers into his coat and hold his lapels as he places his hands on my waist.

"Christine, I love you too." He says softly after he breaks the kiss, his forehead laying against mine. I smile at him and it feels like my heart has grown to the point where it wants to burst from my chest.

"You don't know how long I have waited to hear you say that." I repeat his words and he smiles back at me. For once a carefree smile graces his lips, one that is made purely from joy and love.

" _Floating, falling, sweet intoxication."_ I sing to him.

" _Close your eyes let your spirit start to soar! And you'll live as you've never lived before."_ He responds smiling.

"Come Christine, shall we write a duet in the darkness of the music of the night?" he says to me.

"Take me away with you. Let's run away, together. Leave all of this behind, and start our lives a new. Let our dreams begin." I say to him.

"Anywhere you wish to go Christine. I will follow you to the ends of the Earth." He gins and opens the mirror.

We take the first step together into the darkness and then turned to watch the mirror close. Off into the darkness we go; the darkness that welcomes us into its folds as if we are coming home. We are off to start a new life together, outside of Paris, outside of the Opera House, somewhere unknown. I look up into his eyes and know this is the choice I should've made ten years ago when it was first offered to me.

"Are you sure Christine?" he whispers to me softly.

I turn around and see his face in the last glimpse of light. I stand on my toes and remove his mask. He breathes in sharply as I lay my hand on his disfigured face.

"I'm sure Eric." I whisper to him and kiss him lightly. The door closes and I feel my heart soar as I give myself to him fully and completely, mind, heart and soul. This is the life I chose many years ago, and finally I can feel the Music of the Night that he loves so much. In every touch, every beat of our hearts it is there, hidden, waiting to be found, and released and now that it has been there is no stopping it.


End file.
